Since I was young people had always been making choices for me, telling me where to go and what to do. Even if they didn’t tell me society or the illusion of independance always chose the path. It made me feel that my life was predetermined, and safe. but now I see that the roads that others are driving me down are dead ends and the only way for me to go is to state my own course, and burn bridges that I cross every day to do so.
When you don’t make your own choices you don’t have a reason to live. you are just a faceless puppet in an ocean of deceit. I have decided that if I don’t make my own choices in life then my life isn’t for me. If my life isn’t for me and myself alone, then I don’t want it anymore.
Some people find family the most important thing in the world. I feel like I’m offending people when I say that my values lie in individuality and time. I have realized that the only thing holding me back, holding me in are the people who think they can make my choices for me: my family. Choosing between yourself and your family shouldn’t be this easy, ever. But they have made the choice painfully obvious.
Through my restless dreams I have seen the gates to happiness, and the only way to do so is to leave behind my tormented past and make sure I’d never want to return. The time won’t be now, but it will be soon. I cast my life into the shadows of chance. After all, even limbo is better than hell.